My Beef with Harley Davidsons

Our subdivision was built by the same guy who owns an adjacent golf course, and so all the streets are named things like 'Fairway' and 'Sandtrap'. A lot of retirees from across Canada have chosen our subdivision to live in, and yet, confusingly, there is an elementary school smack in its middle. I like the subdivision because all of the utilities are buried under ground, and people make concerted efforts to grow colourful and interesting looking vegetation.

What I don't like about our subdivision is the fact that about three or four guys own and drive Harley Davidsons.

I don't have anything against motorcycles in general. I certainly think they are dangerous (one sits on a catapult), but we live in a reasonably free society, and if people want to risk their lives unnecessarily, it is up to them. Some motorcycles have good mufflers and are as quiet as cars: I have no problem with Kawasakis, Yamahas, Hondas and BMW's.

However, Harleys are different. They seem to be designed to create more rather than less sound. Those in my neighbourhood may even have been re-tooled so that they are even louder than they were directly from the factory. When these people drive through our quiet subdivision streets, they often engage the clutch and rev their engines to emit as much noise as possible. Sometimes it seems as if they are torturing some wild animal. The sound will drown out music on our home stereo, and completely disrupt conversation. A friend of mine, who has since moved, told me that their baby would cry every time the Harleys would go past. Why do people feel that they have to be so loud?

It might be a strange and wayward side effect of testosterone, as I don't know any women who are compelled to be so loud in public. Perhaps being so publicly obnoxious is a strategy for attracting a mate. Human nature is a tricky thing, and it is entirely possible that men drive Harleys and make horrendous sounds in public for the same reason peacocks plume their tail feathers when a female approaches.
















Then again, men who drive Harleys might be banking less on the appeal of loud engine noises than the persona they perceive is evoked by such behaviour. Perhaps they see themselves as James Dean or Marlon Brando-like 'rebels without a cause'. They might think women find such behaviour irresistably sexy.

However, what if it has nothing to do with sex, but is rather a display of aggression against society? Are these Harley drivers like the guys in bell towers with high-powered rifles picking off innocent people, or those guys who introduce viruses onto the Internet?

Whether such behaviour is a mating ritual or an egregious act of aggression against society, the Harley drivers in my neighbourhood are a pain in the ass.